Father Matthew Accurso had to say goodbye to his newborn son three weeks after his wife ᴅɪᴇᴅ during childbirth.
Matthew and Lauren Accurso, a couple who had been together for 20 years, were expecting their fourth child, a boy. Little Matthew was about to come into the world and joyfully meet his three big sisters, Ali Rose (8), Naomi Belle (5), and Layna Louise (2). But their hopes for the future came to an abrupt halt when Lauren, 37, suddenly ᴘᴀssᴇᴅ ᴀᴡᴀʏ during childbirth on April 29. Her ᴅᴇᴀᴛʜ was “unavoidable and a very rare medical case.” Baby Matthew was rushed to intensive care, fighting for his life because he had been deprived of oxygen for too long during the birth.
While mourning his wife and caring for his three daughters, the father did everything he could to be at the hospital with his newborn son. Although his condition seemed to be improving, it suddenly turned around. Accurso wrote a letter, which his pastor Matt McCloghry later posted on Facebook, to thank everyone who stood by him and his family during such a chaotic time in his life. Accurso also explained the terribly difficult decision he had to make to get his newborn son off the device and opened up about the wonder of his short life.
“Today was one of the hardest days of my life. It will forever be etched in my brain. I sat in a room at Wolfsons hospital with 15 highly qualified medical professionals who all care deeply for our newborn son Matthew. Unfortunately, the last thing I ever thought I would have to talk about as a father was now very real and happening.”
“For those of you who may not know, Matthew is suffering from significant ʙʀᴀɪɴ ɪɴᴊᴜʀʏ due to a prolonged period without oxygen during his birth.”
“As a result, several serious ᴄᴏᴍᴘʟɪᴄᴀᴛɪᴏɴs related to cognitive function and development have become a reality for Matthew. At this time Matthew is being supported by a breathing machine requiring an airway tube, and also a feeding tube.”
“Based on the severity of his condition Matthew will not be able to sustain life without these medical devices in place, what we would typically describe as “life support”. Over the past few weeks doctors have attempted to wean him off the machines, but sadly the results have not been positive.”
“Upon hearing this news, My first reaction as Matthews’s daddy was to sweep my sweet boy up and carry him as far away from machines, medications, life support, and hospital smells as I could. I wanted to whisk him away to our family condo on the beach and let the healing kisses of his sisters, grandmas, and cousins cleanse his little body of all his infirmities, but as life sometimes does, I was brought back down to the reality that my only son, the sweet boy that my wife so diligently and lovingly carried for 9 months is in a situation that daddy could not fix.”
“The ONLY hope in all of this could only come from his heavenly daddy who placed breathe in Matthews’s lungs from the very beginning,” he continued.
“TODAY, I was faced with something no father should ever have to face. The decision is to place Matthew on endless life-supporting contraptions and medications or allow God to carry him where He will.
So many thoughts have run through my head. “What more can I give Lord, you have my soul mate and now my son. That is all I can bear. Please shower your mercy over me. This weight is too great!”
Accurso explained that the life of his only son is a real miracle.“Some will hear our story and think, what an awful tragedy. Some will think, where is God when we need him? Some will say, see, miracles don’t happen.”
“But do you want the truth? Matthew is a living miracle. See, Matthews coming into the world was far from normal. The minute his mommy took her last breath Matthew was thrust from the most peaceful world one could ever know into a chaotic frenzy to save his mother and him,” he explained.
“Without an ounce of oxygen, he made it in an ambulance, to an emergency room, through an ᴇᴍᴇʀɢᴇɴᴄʏ ᴄ-sᴇᴄᴛɪᴏɴ, and into a NICU. Matthew then defied all odds and opened his eyes, breathed on his own, pumped blood through his strong heart, moved his limbs without rigidity, and even made coo noises.
His body slowly began to function, and he even gripped my finger when from what we were told, that should have been impossible.”
“Often times we consider things miracles when the miracle looks how we want it to look. What I’ve learned is that miracles are miracles whether we choose to see them or not. My miracle was having my soul mate by my side for almost 20 years and then being so blessed to give her 4 gorgeous babies,” he wrote.
“My miracle is holding my newborn son for as many precious moments as possible and when the time comes, lifting him up to his mommy so that she can hold him for the first time in paradise.”
I would be so grateful for your prayers in the coming days as we work with the doctors and medical staff and plan to see Matthew off to his mommy and Heavenly Father.”
Matthew reported that his namesake son had ᴘᴀssᴇᴅ ᴀᴡᴀʏ. Until the last moment, he was in his father’s arms, surrounded by his family and closest friends. Now, finally, he is in the arms of his heavenly Father and an earthly mother.
